Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Hint: The Forbidden Forest)

!Headmaster Danilo ยท Sunday, May 11, 2025 - 12:32am

So your Headmaster (me) just dropped a new feature that's basically Pokemon but with more British accents and ethical ambiguity. Enter the Fantastic Beasts Module, where you punch magical creatures in the face, then shove them into a sentient suitcase like a deranged wizard hoarder.

You'll meet Newt Scamander (aka Magical Steve Irwin), buy a suitcase (because apparently backpacks are passe), and start your morally dubious journey to "catch 'em all" but only one of each, because this isn't a petting zoo, it's a prestige prison.

Fight creatures. Capture them. Log their trauma in your Bestiary. Rank up until you're a Supreme Magizoologist (which sounds fake but okay). Give your beasts names like "FartGoblin" or "VoldyDaddy" because this system allows color formatting and we know you can't be trusted with power.

Will there be trading? Maybe in the future. Will we read your feedback? Also maybe. Just don't cry if we don't implement your 42-slide deck on creature mating mechanics.

Now go forth. Capture beasts. Name them dumb things. Do your best impression of Cesar Millan.

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